Fail

I just wrote an exam for my Shakespeare class and I think I might have failed it. Oh well, there's nothing I can do about it now. I don't sweat the small stuff. I just really need to learn to stop procrastinating, because if I got all my readings done I would get a lot more out of my classes.

I probably would have done much better on the exam if I hadn't spent yesterday going with my sister to pick out frames for her reading glasses. We went to Starbucks at Chapters first and had tea lattes. I'm so glad they have london fogs there now, but they're not as good as the ones at the cafe on campus. I didn't buy any books, unfortunately or fortunately. I did get some cd's though:


A collection of songs by the lovely Lady Ella, First Lady of Song, master of scat. It was a wonderful deal: ten cd's for 16 dollars.





Same deal for a collection of Louis Armstrong songs. I have pretty much unlimited Ella and Louis now.





And also, how could I pass it up: Bob Dylan, Time Out of Mind.






After Chapters we went to the mall to check out some frames, and I convinced her to get Buddy Holly glasses. Because they're cool. And I want to steal them. We have the same prescription so it will be happening.
We also found a tea store that we never knew existed and now I want to live there.

Anyway, I have a lot of reading to do that I should be getting to. I have to finish Neuromancer and start reading Angels of America for tomorrow, but it might not happen. I love fridays. I only have one class and I definately plan on taking my books to my favourite coffee shop after and reading the day away.

Whole

(Please don't use photo without permission.)

Lights on in the building across the street
Shadows, swift, slither past windows
Mirror me, be whole
for me, hollowed and afflicted,
missing pieces left in lakes and lecture halls,
both fleshy, raw, and intangible
With asymptotic closeness you mock and intrigue
but the distance, the distance,
is always between
Maybe one day we'll meet, when infinity
closes its long stretching fist.
But whose shadow am I? Whose
whole to a part?
Whose silhouette in the window
across the street?

Three Men in Florence

(Photo by me. Please don't use without permission.)

...and they called the third Wrinkly:

"Dude, we would look so cool right now if you just learned how to use an iron."
"Shut up. I didn't hire you two to critique my fashion sense. I hired you to make me look like someone famous..."
"Well, you do look like you just rolled out of bed after a week long heroine marathon."
"I was going for shabby chic..."

Different

(Photo by me. Please don't use without permission.)

When you're not human, standing out makes humans love you more. When you are human, it's a different story.

Tired and Studying Shakespeare

(Photo by me. Please don't use without permission.)

Reading:
Lolita - Nabokov
Lilith's Brood- Butler (for school)
Neuromancer - Gibson (" ")


It's been snowing for days and I'm starting to miss summer.My days are spent staring at the blinding white snow in front of my feet and taking half-hearted notes on Lacan and Harold Bloom, early Canadian literature, Shakespearean sonnets, popping iron pills and multivitamins, swallowing my desire to sleep and taking deep breaths for each step forward. I'm anticipating exams and papers and reading plays for an exam next week; I can't close read because I'm too short-sighted, so I'm worried I'll fail. I'm so behind on all my readings I worry I'll never catch up, but enough about school. The little things don't matter in the big picture, and I'm too tired to keep worrying like I do.


Sometimes I wish I could just sleep all day, or stay in bed and read something for the pleasure of it and not because I have to.

Lake Ontario has frozen over and people are walking on the ice, holding dice in their hands and playing at being Jesus. Everything looks like a miracle from far enough away. My grandfather remembers the days when they used to drive on the ice to and from Wolfe Island and my Dad remembers seeing ice-breakers moving slowly on the lake. The world has changed and is changing still. The only certain thing about this life is that time will herd us forward and their is no resisting it's nip at our heels. It will keep on herding us until we are gone and there is nothing left to herd.

Old Coat

Wear the old coat and buy the new book
- Austin Phelps

I find that this is very true for me, as I seem to have many old coats and even more new books. It's not that I sacrifice coat-buying for book-buying, but that I simply prefer book shopping to coat shopping.

Recoil

Come home and my guitar

Has nothin to say to me

I recoil from all my friends

And then I'm in misery

Been so long since I've been held

Really since I was his

Probably just need to be held

That's probably all it is

Course, then I think of my dad

Who time travels mostly now

Back to when he was free

And holding out hope somehow

Who sits all day in a line

Of wheelchairs against a wall

Inventing ways to play out time

Like us all

Like us all

To all the people out there tonight

Who are comforting themselves

If you should happen to see my light

You can stop and ring my bell

I'm just sittin here in this sty

Strewn with half written songs

Taking one breath at a time

Nothin' much going on

Nothin' much going on

Little flashing zero

On my answering machine

Rats scratching at my brain

Brain shuffling its feet

Yes I have my father's heart

It may or may not keep on trying

Can't really tell you what it is

Keeps me this side of that dark line

But I'm not there to take care of him

And I'm not here to take care of me

I'm going outside to watch the house burn down

Across the street

I'm going outside to watch the house burn down

Across the street

To all the people out there tonight

Who are comforting themselves

If you should happen to see my light

You can stop and ring my bell

I'm just sitting here in this sty

Strewn with half written songs

Taking one breath at a time

Nothin' much going on

Nothin' much going on

- Ani DiFranco